A lot of people are mentioning the stages of a relationship, but everybody seems to have their own set of stages. I managed to find five stages of relationships or five stages of love in relationships, which are describing how the interaction between lovers is naturally developing.What is very important is how both partners see the relationship and the stage they are in. In that way they can avoid a lot of the conflicts.
Actually, these stages aren’t that straightforward, meaning that we kind of “flirt” with these stages since the beginning of each one of our relationships. You could actually say that a 40 year old happy couple are still doing the first stage from time to time. So, take these stages very lightly. They aren’t to be taken that seriously. After all, you can be happy with or without reading my article. Here is what I think are the most fundamental five stages of relationships. Proceed and feed your curiosity.
Stage 1: The falling in love stage
This is the stage where all the good feelings reside. This stage if full of passion, lust, wonder and shocking emotions and all the amazing feelings that we feel we are born to experience. Most people feel like they have been waiting for this their entire lives. It’s a lovely mixture of sexual tension (which is given by the differences between partners) and the joy of acceptance (which is given by the shared spiritual level).
Stage 2: Balancing the emotions
This stage is marked by the transition from their idealistic personalities to their real personalities. The “fever” cools down, and the relationship becomes more stable. Less random and intense emotions are shared, but the emotions that occur are more stable and the episodes of intense feelings have a sense of control to them.
The partners begin to really feel each other and learn when is the appropriate to feel a certain way. But this one of the toughest relationship stages. This where most couples break up due to a realization that they weren’t who they thought the were.
Stage 3: Finding your real long term place
Once they become their true selves, both partners begin to test each other’s limits, to find their real places inside the relationship. At this point both of them put their cards on the table and there is no mystery about each other’s kinks and quirks, wants and needs. Our brains are naturally programmed to challenge leadership and most often the female in the relationship challenges the male in order to feel his strength until she is happy and able to surrender to his leadership.
Unfortunately this is where most couples get stuck. Among all stages of a relationship, this is the one where people have a hard time transcending it. Most couples who reach this stage are pretty much convinced that this is it, that a relationship should be filled with drama and occasional arguing. The lowest point this stage is the sexism. Partners that can’t find a way to move on into the next stage, the forth stage, are usually stuck up into the sexist paradigms and are unwilling to see beyond their own hurt ego.
Stage 4: The true relationship
Once the power struggle ends and the roles are finally set, the couple begins to feel their relationship “morphing” into something new. All of sudden they start working together in a more natural progression than they used to.They don’t challenge each other anymore and they begin to naturally interact in whatever they are doing. They are actually tired of arguing. They just don’t care about who is right anymore.
Stage 5: Unity
When both partners surrender to each other and they become one, they start doing great things together and help other people. They team up for the greater good. They are like a force of nature. They are one and everyone can feel it. They are actively interacting with the world and there is an aura around them. At this point, the lovers rarely speak to one another. They feel each other so much that they don’t need to explain themselves to one another.
The fifth relationship stage is actually the first stage transitioned from an animal lusty side when their purpose is to love each other to the fullest, to a spiritual side where the couple uses that “lust” and devotion they have for each other to better the world. Their love doesn’t go only between one another, but their love combines and goes outward creating wonderful things. They feel like one, they love like one. When they look into each other’s eyes they know, they know who they are – they are the same.
Conclusion
These are what I describe as 5 stages of relationships. With any individual that you meet and classify as a potential mate, there is a high possibility your will never reach the fifth stage with them, which is actually natural to happen. Most people aren’t ready for the fifth stage. What most people do is, they develop negative emotions once a person doesn’t seem to reach the fifth stage or the stage they wish to be in. Although is perfectly normal for that to not happen, most people don’t realize that is for the best not to let everyone reach the higher stages.
We need to understand and honor the path of our ex-es and our future ex-es. We don’t have to suffer just because we are not compatible on the long run, or on the short run for that matter. It doesn’t matter what stage you are in, you must appreciate every one of your partners.
A lot of people tend to rush into doing things and they “force” the progression thinking that all relationships should reach the next stage faster, especially at the beginning. When they are still on the first stage some couples rush into making unnecessary long term plans because they are too afraid of not losing each other. And by doing so they add tension in the relationship and it usually ends up badly. So, respect your relationship progression and realize that you need to take your relationship one day at a time, don’t make too many plans, live in the moment.
Read more articles:
How Do You Know You Are Compatible
How to Fix a Broken Relationship
Misconceptions about Age Difference in Relationships
